10/18/11

Bullys

It is my job as a parent to keep my children safe and to help them grow up as happy, healthy, productive people.  Really -- the job is that simple.  But some days its so hard, so hard that it beaks your heart.

I was sitting on my office floor reviewing a production proposal and making the Laugh and Learn Puppy sing (working mom multitasking!) Friday afternoon when my cell phone rang; the caller id said "Grace's School". Of course, those are the calls you stop everything for to answer.

Apparently, Grace told one of her teachers that she is being bullied.  At her day care center but the kid goes to the same school and is two grades older.  Maybe bully is the wrong word -- I feel like it gets thrown around a lot but threatened seems a little harsh when we are talking about 2nd and 4th graders.  So we are going with bully.

After phone calls with school, the director of the day care, and several chats with Grace, I feel totally helpless.  I cant go to school with her.  I cant call the other child's mother and scream and yell like I want to. And I cant really fix the problem either.  All I can do is equip Grace with the tools to deal with mean kids.  I signed her up for a social skills class with the guidance counselor.  We are keeping an open dialogue about the issue at home.  And we are trying to encourage her to make friends with other kids at day care now that the bully has left (yep - he got kicked out of day care for the same kind of issues!!). 

I am proud of her that she wants to try to deal with it; she told me this boy's lunch table on Mondays is near hers but that she likes her table and wont move seats just to get away from him; that she wants to try to handle it but ignoring him cause she thinks he will win if she moves her seat.  It made me so proud to hear her say that -- she isnt running away from the problem. But now on Mondays, during the time I know she is at lunch, I worry,  And I feel my anxiety rising thinking about my little girl dealing with all this. 




2 comments:

Maya said...

Yikes! I am so sorry Grace has to deal with this :-( FWIW I think you're handling it the right way. It's great that Grace felt she could come forward and tell an adult about what's happening, that you are keeping an open dialogue with her, and that the school is aware so they can monitor the situation. Those skills will serve her well as she gets older.

aspieside.com said...

I am so sorry this is happening. I blog a lot about my experiences with bullying on my blog. I think she is doing a great job of handling it. I hope the other kid gets the help he needs to learn how to not be bully. BTW I found you through Marfan Mom.