New Road for Me

"Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it." - Lou Holtz

My favorite quote of all time.  One that at one time, I promised to live by.  Lately, I have come to understand that I failed on that promise to myself.  I didnt live by that. I let my attitude turn and lose the ability and the motivation to do anything but exist. 

I am done with that now. 

As I type, I am out of town on a work trip. I am surrounded by 50 meeting attendees and one co-worker.  None of my family and none of my friends are here with me......I have time to sit just with me and reflect on the goods and the bads, the triumphs and the mistakes of the past year or so - whether they were entirely my fault or not.  And I have time to decide what my attitude is going to be when I arrive home. 

The attitude I have had in the past is one of bitterness - bitter that I didnt get the wedding dress I really wanted or bitter that we never had real newlywed time or bitter that I cant go to happy hour cause I have day care pickup that night.   And know what, being bitter is exhausting.  

I have such a full life - a husband that makes sure we have everything we need, a little girl who loves me and who I cannot imagine the world without, a family that is there when I need them, a job that I actually enjoy, and we have doctors that are keeping my family healthy in the face of Ma.rfan Synd.rome.  And as I come to grips with all this, I realize that my friends really do like me and are still there for me, even after all the drama I have dished out in the past year.  

I have the ability to be happy.  I am motivated to move past the disappointments in the past and embrace all that I do have today.  And my attitude will be positive as I start down this new road.

1 comment:

Bri said...

Just remember what you wrote:

I have the ability to be happy.