Last week, I decided to go through my wedding pictures and order some re-prints. I threw together an album after the wedding but with everything going on back then (pregnant, sick mother in law, crazy parents of mine), my heart wasnt really in it. I was just glad to be married to my Bill. Anyways, long story short, I lost the cds full of wedding pictures! All 800 pictures were gone! Almost in tears, I called my photographer (who I am friends with now) and she had them all saved for me! The new cds arrived in the mail this weekend. After spending 2 hours loading all the pics on my computer, I actually sat and looked through each one of them. I must say----given all the drama surrounding our wedding, Bill and I looked great! :) In honor my rediscovery of my wedding pictures, I am posting a few here for all to enjoy!

My sister is getting married in May, friends are getting married in December, and there is at least one couple we are expecting to get engaged soon. And then I have the wedding I was hired to plan. Ever since my wedding, I have been bitter (yes I am admitting it to all!) about weddings. My planning experience wasnt all that fun, my dress selection was based on necessity, not desire, and all I wanted was the day to be over so we could move on with our life together. I didnt get to have my mom there to pick out invitations or bridesmaids to come with me to look at dresses or even have the chance to be picky about what I chose. I had 6 weeks to get it done and whatever we could afford on our own or pull together is what I got. The morning of my wedding was hectic and I can tell you that the girls (bridesmaids and bride) were starving by the time we walked down the aisle. When arriving at the church, we had not eaten all day, the bride was not speaking to her mother, and it was pouring rain. Bill and I made it through the wedding and can even laugh about some of the drama now.

Now that my sister is getting married, my mother and I have to face a wedding together. She says all the time that she is making up for her crapiness at my wedding by spoiling Grace, etc. I REALLY dont think so but if that makes her feel less guilty, so be it! Bring on the toys and clothes and all the other stuff she wants to buy for her granddaughter! This is my goodbye to my wedding bitterness. It is definitely still in me but I am tired of feeling it so much. I know that some of my feelings on this subject wont go away but that's okay. What I learned in that whole dramatic process was better than anything a dream wedding could give me. My mother still judges me, my best friends will stand beside me no matter what, and my husband will love me forever in good times and in tough times.

I can still say that it wasnt my dream wedding but does that really matter? A wedding lasts for 6 hours but a marriage is a lifetime. What I ended up with was an okay wedding but the marriage I got in return is better than I ever imagined. I love you babe (are you even reading this?!)


Kristen said...

It looks beautiful on you - so perhaps that is a dream dress, in a way, right. Mine wasn't either - I had to nurse in it - and I was 3 months post pardum - and I didn't fit in the one I had bought at 3 months preggo. It all ended well, though, and as you said, that's what matters. Thanks for sharing your pics!

So-Called Supermom said...

HAHA---I was actually 5 months preggers in these pictures! My belly "popped" about a week after the wedding!!! Perfect timing!